10 Dating Dos and Don’ts from a Woman’s Perspective

Sex on the Beach is Danielle’s preferred cocktail, although the app Carb Tracker suggests Smartwater. Sexting doesn’t amuse her in any way, and she’s disgusted thinking about what may be peeping out of her Inbox. Boring. She, by all practical purposes, has “got it going on.” Danielle works out three times a week, watches her carb intake, eats fiber daily, and is considering taking pole dancing classes, just for the “heck of it.” Her consultant job allows her to travel in and out of state, shop and dine at high-end places, and date gorgeous and not so hot men.

Five, Six, Eight minute dates are all a blur, but “that one guy in Atlanta may get another date,” she recalls, texting him while we talk. eHarmony and Match.com solicit her with free-trial coupons, that she admits to trying once or twice. These days Danielle tells her past dates what they did right and wrong, surprisingly not charging a fee. She claims her dating wisdom is so good that former boyfriends call her for advice on a regular basis. She points out, “The first date is a deal breaker either you’re in or out.” There are no three strikes and you’re out with her. It’s either you got it, or you don’t.

10 Dating Dos & Don’ts
1. Hygiene is important. All smells are not good smells. Don’t smell like your house. Don’t over do it on cologne.
2. Be creative on where you take your date out to eat. Chain restaurants are not always advised. Try something a little more romantic, not just a place with a dollar menu.
3. If you make it to the second date, do not wear the same outfit. I”ll say it again, I strongly advise you not to wear the same outfit twice. It’s understandable to have a favorite shirt or pants, but you need to switch it up a bit.
4. If your going to pick up your date and you don’t have a nice car, it must be clean. No dust. No syrup residue from beverages, or funky gym clothes in the back seat. Clean your ride!
5. If your date doesn’t finish her meal, then do not ask for a to-go box for her meal. Do not eat her meal and yours.
6. As a part of dating etiquette, communication is key.
7. Be on time. You only get one first impression.
8. Always pay the bill. If you’re not paying, then it’s not a date.
9. Don’t expect a kiss at the end of the night. It’s always nice to try, because women like to feel desired. It’s OK, even if you get “shot down.” Sometimes a kiss on the cheek, and nice hug will do!
10. Don’t stalk her, but do call her to follow-up within three business days after the first date. You snooze, you lose.

Article Published in Elephant Journal

Bringing Sexy Back After Baby

Southwest Parenting Magazine
Staring in the mirror at my brown, naked body after having my son frightened the heck out of me! I was so appalled that my once somewhat shapely, high school sprinter and college homecoming sorority queen figure had gone caput. This image staring back at me in the mirror looked like Shrek, a “cute” monster. I tried to style my hair differently, wear make-up and show some newly developed cleavage, but nothing could help my 211-pound figure. Bottom line, I needed to lose weight.

Before I had my son, I weighed in with my shoes off at 163 lbs. A twenty-eight- year-old, 5’5 ½” tall woman, is a pretty huggable size. My husband liked my new post baby figure, but he wasn’t toting around the extra weight. A trainer at a nearby gym checked my Body Mass Index (BMI) and said that I was borderline obese. I cried and continued to eat. My mom tried to console me by recommending nutritional foods to eat, and sending magazines ads and literature on “Ways to Tone Your Abs” and “How to Get
J’ Lo’s Buns.” The materials started collecting dust on my shelf.

One day, I woke up and decided that I was going to beautify these new stretch marks, flabby middle, and discolored neck. I created a schedule for myself with a daily routine to bring sexy back and unleash my inner “hot mama.” Maintaining my enthusiasm, I also decided to do the following: post a calendar in my bathroom to keep track of my weight daily, create a motivational board, post positive quotes in my office, and seek advice from a professional trainer.

Kimberly Isom, a certified International Sports Sciences Association (ISSA) personal trainer, advised mothers to be consistent with their workout regiment. She stated, “Exercise and eating healthy goes hand and hand to shed those unwanted pounds. Eating healthy lends itself to some very tasty options and there are several ways to substitute bad ingredients for good ones to whip up a very tasty dish. You should commit to at least two-three days of resistance training and cardio per week and clean up those cabinets for healthy food and snacks, but always remember to read the labels and stay away from the processed items, high sugar, and sodium foods. Drink plenty of water, and you are well on your way bringing sexy back!”

My son will turn two years old in June. I’m now weighing in at 145 lbs. I would like to lose 10 more pounds, but I’m a lot happier now with my weight than I was after I had my child. My best advice is to do your best and stay the course. It will take some time to get into a routine. After a couple of weeks, you will start working out unconsciously and will be looking finer than fine in no time!